Zing!

Gay Bingo!

Was so much fun! Thanks to my beautiful, and humourous friends. We were the rowdy table during the night. If you think bingo is boring, you need to play a game with my friends. It is non stop impressions of older women with smoky voices, and lots of lucky trolls and ponies. The numbers were called by drag queens, so the night was full of dirty jokes.
My arm is still a little sore today, from all that dabbing. Now I know how teenage boys, and married mens arms feel.. if you know what I mean. If you don’t, I will have to spell it out for you. My arm hurts because of bingo, but I compared it to the soreness of a teenage boy, or married mans arm due to masturbating. Because those are the only groups of people who do that.

I went shopping with Goddess today, and bought a few brightly coloured skinny pants. It is a first for me. I really like them, and I think they look decent on me. When I wear the green pair, I look like a blade of grass waving in the wind. I should take up interpretive dance. I can artfully recreate the death of a blade of grass due to a lawn mower.

I have been taking it pretty easy lately. I’m saving energy for this weekend. I should just eat a cake or two, and then hibernate. It works for bears, and I'm pretty sure that is what Beyonce does between cd releases.

This weekend is going to be CRAZY! Partying all the time.

Saturday I am going to walk in the Pride Parade. It is always a good time. I see so many friends there, it will be really good to catch up and say ‘hi’ to everyone. I love seeing how many of us there actually are, when we take over the street our numbers look huge. We all come together to have a good time, and celebrate. I hope the Radical Cheerleaders are there. I love their cheers.

After the Parade, there is a gathering on City Hall. I love the fact that it is on City Hall, with a beer garden and everything. It feels like we are breaking the rules, or something.

From there I am heading to Silky Spectre's birthday party. I hope she has a good birthday. Sometimes birthdays get so much work and excitement put into them that they never really live up to what they were supposed to be. But it is the same night as the best party of the summer, how could it not be fun?

Yes, this weekend is a non stop party. There are a few people who are usually still pretty drunk at the parade from the night before. It just continues on into the night. No one feels their best on Sunday.
If anyone was to judge us off this weekend alone, they would think we all need a good stint in rehab. Maybe I could share a room with Lindsay Lohan! Well they wouldn't think I needed rehab, because I don't drink. But I still get pretty crazy.
I stop worrying about consequences, and the proper thing to do for one night. Well I let go for me, which is still really tame for most people.
Maybe that is why we all feel so bad on Sunday, all those consequences from the night before slap us right in the face. Like Cher, "Snap out of it!" How awesome would it be if the spirit of consequences looked like Cher! Well we all know she looks like the consequence of plastic surgery. Zing!

From Silky Spectre's party I am heading to the Pride Dance on Broadway. I still need to find a gold bow tie! Help! A friend of mine is putting on the dance, so I know it will be spectacular. He is a really hard worker, and he has an amazing sense for making things fun. The music is being put on by DJ Trouble from Wired 96.3. It will be a nice change from the regular DJ's of Diva's.

The night is just beginning my friends, grab a few energy drinks for the real party has yet to happen. Diva's!!! The dance on Broadway ends early, at one, so from there everyone will head to Diva's. It is going to be packed to capacity in there. I am going to dance, and sweat a few pounds off. The atmosphere on that night is so electric. Everyone is buzzing with energy. So many hot girls *crosses fingers*, and hot boys.

Pride makes everyone a little slutty. Let's be honest. If we are celebrating our love, we want some fucking lovin'. Right? Well that is what I am going to tell myself to make myself feel better about what I do this weekend.

I am going to apologize now, for my actions this Saturday. I am not going to wake up with a tattoo on my face, married, or in bed next to someone I don't know. But I will be a huge flirt, and will probably push some lines. I may wake up with a tattoo, just not on my face. Maybe something classy, like a pair of lips on my inner thigh.

I'm going to eat those two cakes, and nap. Prepare to get sweet.

- Avery 'Blade of Grass' Eros